Emotional roller coaster. That sums up what I felt in the last few weeks before my big adventure.
It was exciting and liberating to think of what experiences I would have but thinking of what I was giving up for that was making me nervous as hell. I was having conflicting thoughts like “I am finally leaving London like I had always wanted to but I am also packing up 7 years of my life here.” “I will meet so many new people but I am going to be away from some of my closest friends.” “I can go wherever I want, whenever I want but I won’t have a home for the next year or so.” “I will get to eat food from so many different countries but I won’t really get to cook up a storm like I love doing coz well, I won’t have a home or my own kitchen.”
I was constantly having to take a moment, to just breathe and tell myself to look at not what I was leaving behind but to look forward in life. A place to call home, a kitchen to cook and bake in, my friends, would all be there if and when I wanted to come back. An opportunity to travel like this might not always be there.
Before I knew it though, the packing was done and 7 years were downsized to a few bags and boxes, good-byes were said and it was time to leave for the airport.
What did I feel when I got on that flight? Relaxed, at peace, like it was just meant to be.